Mine is Red What's Yours?

Last week something unique happened in Facebook. Suddenly women started giving their status updates in color. Which was not a big deal to begin with because you can leave it to a woman to sum up their status in a color; but soon it started multiplying. To all the 150 million men in Facebook and the 3 women who had no clue what’s happening, here’s the secret. Someone from Detroit came up with the idea for Breast Cancer Awareness asking women to write the color of their bra as status update and keep us men guessing and eventually make us realize that the most thought about topic in our mind can cause death to a woman if not treated at the right time.
I think it was a big milestone for electronic media, because this was the first time someone realized the power of chain mail, the most hated technical word. So instead of sending chain mail about Bill Gates giving out free money, or some person dying of some disease, this person used it effectively. To me, it was a moment of humility and realizing that learning never ends. I thought I have maxed out on learning on one subject: Bras and there is nothing else I can learn. I thought I got a masters on that subject based on my research during my college days and I obtained the phd after learning from Frank Kastanza the different cup sizes and the straps in Seinfeld. But I was WRONG!
One thing I did not know was that bras come in so many colors and prints! White, Black and the revolutionary Pink, what else can it be? I did not know that it now comes in colors like Electric Blue, Aquamarine Green, Bloodstained Red, Sweaty Yellow, Mountain Breeze Purple, Deep Valley Green, Silicon Orange and other colors. Also I did not know it comes in so many different prints like yellow and purple stripes, different combinations of faded blue and can also have Bob Marley’s picture imprinted on it. Out of few thousand updates I saw (some updated their status multiple times), the best update went to a friend of mine who said Colorless. Actually I almost gave the award to someone who said Nude, but to my utter dismay I found out that’s another color available for Asset management.
I then had an Edison moment. Why not create another original campaign by copying the idea? Microsoft has successfully done that and so have all the Bollywood music directors, so why can’t I? How about asking all men to write something as their status update to raise Awareness for Prostate Cancer? Here’s some idea on which I want people to vote and then I will select the one that gets the maximum vote. Also, just to emphasize the fact the all literary work would have been ten times better if it was written in a powerpoint mode, here are some suggested status updates for men in itemized format:

1. Number of times you thought about sex in a day, rounded off to the nearest million.
2. Time it takes to cancel the above idea because your wife or girlfriend might think that’s the number of your past girlfriend.
3. Number of days before your death when you realize that number is actually the number of boyfriends your wife had.
4. Time in minutes when you thought that you closely resemble Aamir Khan in the movie 3 Idiots.
5. Time in minutes when you realized that Karena Kapoor was just a poster in your room.
6. The first thing you look at when you see a woman.
7. Breast don’t qualify as an answer to the above.
8. Number of holes of golf you would like to play if given an opportunity.
9. Number of holes of golf Tiger Woods has played.
10. Number of times you got screamed at for not putting down the toilet seat.
11. The color of your underwear, sorry no peeking.
12. The color of the underwear of that girl in your high school.
13. What will be your score when you reach ND Tiwari’s age?
14. How many times has your girl friend asked you about what you were thinking?
15. How many times you have lied to the above question?
16. How many times you have told your wife that you remember seeing her wearing the sari or jewellery at XYZ’s party?
17. How many times another woman has done the same to your wife at XYZ’s party?
18. How many times your spouse has asked you the question “You are not going to wear that to the party?”
19. How many times you wished you have answered “No dear, I just wore it to take an inventory of my wardrobe”?
20. Number of TV channels you scan per day but not watch.



Copyright: AGR Inc, however feel free to copy and circulate. Just wanted to make sure that my name appears in the starting credits when the movie is made!